HEATHER HEYER

How can I be enraged and numb at the same time?
How can I be alive but not living in this day and time?
Horrific HATE is knocking at my door, I’m suddenly looking at my neighbors -unsure of how they feel; do they have it in them… could they kill?
How much more blood will be spilled? Will this country ever heal?
My mom says “PRAY”, my mind says “SLAY”, my heart chants “THERE HAS GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY!”
Horrific Hate cannot win. Horrific hate WILL NOT RULE THIS DAY! While hate took HEATHER and so many like her; their lives WILL NOT HAVE BEEN IN VAIN. We will work through this pain. We will progress in their names!

 

Protection

Their are one hundred and one synonyms for the word protect. Recently I’ve learned that whether you are: defending, securing, safekeeping, or ensuring… it is important that you are the number one PROTECTOR of your own happiness!

If you follow my blog,  you already know that the latter half of 2016 was super stressful for me- mentally, physically, and emotionally. I found myself going through one ordeal after another and constantly defending my beliefs to people whom I thought were on the same page as me. Ultimately I had to remove these people from my life. I had to get back to the basics and revisit the places and things that make me happiest. In doing so, I rediscovered apart of me that was lost. I found the light!

I’ve always known that there is a light inside of me. I’ve felt it burning and bubbling in the center of my chest since I was a little girl. People young and old around the world have seen it. Some have even been able to point it out/ put their finger on it, while others have done their best to snuff it out.

When you find that you are in a relationship (Friendship or Romantic), a job, or any kind of situation that is draining you or dimming your light, it’s okay to walk away in order to protect your happiness. As a matter of fact… don’t walk away- RUN!!! Think about it, if a flower doesn’t bloom you fix the environment in which it grows, not the flower.

So I stress that if you don’t remember anything else that I say, remember this… “While the light inside of us can lead us to great things, light also attracts moths, and the warmth of your light can attract parasites. PROTECT your ENERGY,  SAFEGARUD your LIGHT, and ENSURE your HAPPINESS!”

  • Pic 1: Getting my “Happy” on at the beach
  • Pic2: Words to live by
  • Pic 3: I love the visual of leaving behind the old and embracing the new!

 

Winners & Warriors

You insist on running around town looking and acting like a clown.

Big head in the clouds, tiny toes tipping across the ground

Making a lot of noise, doing any and everything  you can to attract the boys.

You’re too grown for this, so miss me with this.

I refuse to pull up a seat and watch as you self destruct.

Like a mirror, I can’t lie;

I won’t stick around and be your alibi.

I can’t have friends with no couth .

I run with winners and warriors; women who fight for their families and homes. Women who recognize that they are fully grown.

We are daughters  of the sun who don’t give up until the race is won.

We don’t self destruct.

We don’t give in. We don’t care whether or not we fit in-  we were born to stand out!

We are both Winner and Warrior and without a doubt…

We don’t self destruct!

BETTER

Listen. It takes a lot to impress me! I was born in the 80’s and raised in the 90’s by a strong, God fearing single mother, who worked hard to get a degree in nursing in her late twenties. This same woman saved up and moved her family from the hood to the suburbs. My mom held it down! Sometime she had to work two jobs, but she still managed to show up at every concert, pagent, and sporting event her children participated in. I know strength! I can recognize a fearless woman when I see one, and let me just tell you…. Chrisette Michele is all that and more!

I’m not even going to pretend like I wasn’t disappointed when I learned that she’d agreed to perform at Trumps Inagural ball. Chrisette being one of my favorite artist, I was mortified just thinking about how people (Black folks) would react to her decision.  It wasn’t long before the cat was out of the bag, and as expected the dragging begun.

I tried to stay away from “The Facebook” and “The Twitter.” I tried to read between the lines, and understand Chrisette’s motivation. See as a real Chrisette Michele fan, I know that “Sistuh girl” just wrapped a show in which she toured the country over the past six months. Chrisette literally ended one tour only to embark on a second one promoting her own album; which is on her own label! I say that only to say that money could not have been her only motivator!!!

I repeat “MONEY COULD NOT HAVE BEEN HER ONLY MOTIVATOR.” Not when Twitter exploded! Not when thousands of people threatened to boycott, unfollow, and never support her art again.

Thousands of people flooded Chrisette’s Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and business page with hateful messages that ultimately broke my heart. Seeing the storm that this woman was riding shook me to my core. I mean when you love somebody, you never really stop loving them; and I love Chrisette! I love her so much that I had her debut album “I Am”, playing in the delivery room as I gave birth to my first child.

I’m connected with Chrisette, and I’m real with myself! I know that once my mind is made up, there is nothing anyone can say or do to change it. I know that when I am passionate about something, I’ll fight tooth and nail for it! So who am I to judge, look down on, or berate Chrisette Michele simply because she made a decision that I don’t agree with?

I realize that for many of us things got real when Trump was elected to the White House. I know that we are both afraid of, and ready for whatever may come our way with this new administration. However… it is fact that the world will continue to turn until sweet Jesus decides to return for us! Until then, we have got to do a BETTER  job of sticking together and taking care of one another.

We have got to do BETTER!

We laugh and make jokes out of everything when everything ain’t funny! We allow ourselves to be divided, when we should be coming together. We stay shaming folks on social media, all the while leaving undeniable proof that many of us are still but crabs in a bucket!

WE HAVE GOT TO DO BETTER!!!

We build people up, only to tear them down the moment they go against the grain. Sadly, we keep giving life to aweful words like Coon and Jigaboo; these words should have died a long time ago.

Let’s just be real for a moment… internet bullying does not qualify as activism! In the age of social media we are “shucking and jiving” with our Twitter fingers and quick wit. All while sitting behind computer desks or standing in line at Starbucks.

We  are making ourselves look bad, and we have got to do BETTER!

I am by no means a Trump supporter! At this very moment, I am still uncertain as to why Chrisette decided to perform. But what I do know is that Chrisette Michele is a grown woman who can do as she pleases!

Furthermore, I find it ironic that we have been dragging Chrisette all across the internet for days now, yet no one is talking about Floyd Mayweather who sat front and center at Trumps Inauguration! He wasn’t there to box. He wasn’t serving as anybody’s security that night! What he was doing was showing unashamed support for Trump! This man is who y’all should be talking about.

How much money do you spend on fight night? Mayweather makes millions in one night off of Pay-Per-View, and packed arenas! How are we going to walk right past him and give Chrisette the pink slip? If you ask me… it’s sexist! Chrisette got the short end of the stick because well… she’s a she! Every question we ask Chrisette, we should be asking Floyd.  Just because “Sistuh girl” sometimes rocks a fro doesn’t mean that she’s any blacker or more accountable to the community than Floyd “Money” Mayweather!

Anyway, It’s time to move on. I am not going to let Donald Trump stop me from living my life! I  am going to continue to show up in my community.  I will continue to speak out against injustice and advocate for men, women, and children of all races, religions, and sexual orientations. What I will no longer do is participate in tearing down a person.

I am BETTER than that.

We are BETTER than that!

As far as I am concerned, Chrisette Michele has guts! She made a decision for whatever reason and did not backdown when it seemed the world was against her. If she has no more fans, she has me. I will always be in awe of the strength and courage she displayed during this time.

With that said, I already know that some of y’all will get with this, while some of y’all won’t! I’m fine with that. You can say what you like; I’m Brenda’s daughter and while I might bend… I won’t break! I get that from my mama🙌🏾.

GIVE IT UP, TURN IT LOOSE

So you made it to 2017! What now?

Have you set goals or come up with a variety of New Year resolutions that you have no intention of seeing through? Don’t get me wrong… I love ringing in the New Year. I feel its magic and I relish in all of the hope and possibilities that come along with it. However, I’ve never agreed with the concept of waiting to change your life.

If there is one thing that I am certain of, it’s that life comes at you fast and hard, and that no one is promised tomorrow. Therefore I say that the very moment that you are inspired to do better or to be better… you should act! Don’t follow the crowd and start your new health and fitness routine with the rest of the world. If you do, you’ll be more inclined to give up on your goals, when the rest of the world abandons theirs in February.  Don’t wait until the clock strikes midnight to let the love of your life know just how much they mean to you. Do it today, and everyday! If you’ve felt convicted about cussing, drinking, or being argumentative, quit hanging on to those bad habits. Break those chains the moment you feel compelled to do so!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Life is to be lived! Through many trials and tribulations, I’ve learned that I’ve got to do what feels good to my soul ❤

Make 2017 about you! Live authentically and be true to yourself. If you are still unsure of who you are, now is the time to explore. Develop your gifts by investing in something that you love and move at your own pace.

As we settle into the New Year, keep in mind that if you don’t like something about your life, you and only you can change it. So don’t hesitate and don’t delay. As one of my favorite groups En Vogue A.K.A. the Funky Divas once sang…  “Give it up, Turn it Loose”.

Give It Away Now!

Last week I wrote a little about my rock bottom. I talked about my husband becoming ill and all of the life changing events that took place during that time. I shared with you how putting things into prospective and realizing just how blessed my family truly is, helped me to live an abundant life.

This week I’d like to CHALLENGE you to help make a difference! You see all of us who are caught up in this thing we call Social Media, are familiar with the never-ending circle of challenges that go around. We’ve been “So Gone”, “mannequins”,  poured “Ice buckets” over our heads, and a bunch of other things.  As the Season of giving is upon us, let’s take a different approach! Over the next 21 days, I challenge you to uplift someone else ❤

Right now you’re probably starting to panic. You’re thinking of the million and one other obligations that you have, and looking at that budget like, “How can I fit something else in”. You can-TRUST ME! See I want you to know what I learned several years ago. I am by no stretch of the imagination monetarily RICH, but I am RICH in MIND, BODY, and SOUL.  Thus I encourage you to spend the next 21 days focusing on what you have to give instead of what you don’t.

Say these words with me, “There is always enough love and kindness to go around.” If you are ever in doubt, or questioning the impact that you have on the world, speak those words; release them into the atmosphere, press on, and watch how the circle of love you create widens.

No act of kindness is too big or too small! Not sure how to begin? Here are a few suggestions:

  • Gather all of the old cellphones you have lying around the house. Encourage your friends and family to do the same. You can then donate them to The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. They will resell them to fund outreach programs.
  • Donate new or gently used socks (Yes SOCKS!)  to a local shelter. Socks are the most needed, yet least donated items in shelters.
  • Put on your running shoes and headphones,  and grab a trash bag or two! Spend an hour or more picking up trash or raking a neighbor’s yard.
  • Everyone loves Random Acts of Kindness. Pay for a strangers Coffee or give that Coworker who always has your back a pack of Lifesavers  ❤
  • Give Blood if you can! This one is near and dear to my heart as I have Aplastic Anemia. I’ve had to rely on the kindness of strangers many times in my life.
  • Organize a can food drive within your church, social circle, or workplace.
  • Volunteer at a Soup Kitchen
  • Check on an aging or disabled person in your life. See if they need a ride to the supermarket, or simply some companionship.
  • Donate Cat and Dog food to a local animal shelter.
  • Round up any clothes, shoes, or accessories you no longer wear. Donate them to the Salvation Army, Goodwill, or Charity House
  • If nothing else…. BE KIND. Never underestimate the power of a smile, Kind word, or sweet Gesture. Simply making eye contact with a stranger or holding the door open for someone could change their outlook on the entire day. So throw KINDNESS around like Confetti!!!

Additionally, if you aren’t keeping a gratitude journal… now is the time to start! As you are giving of yourself, you will quickly see how blessed you truly are. You’ll be able to point out every little thing in your life that comes together and makes you whole.

Winston Churchill once said: “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” I say, “Giving enriches both our own lives, and the lives of others.”  So please join me in trying to change the world, one small act of kindness at a time ❤

I stayed busy last week! I was blessed to be able to spend time volunteering at my boys school where I lead an amazing night of Physical Fitness, games, and fun. At work, I assisted in organizing our “Toys for Tots” campaign. While at home, my family prepared bags for the homesless. I’m so grateful that I am able to be a blessing to others ❤